Relationship/Marriage Tips-What my father told me

Valentine may be over but what I learnt that day would last me a life time. Valentine's day was supposed to be like any other day for me. I had no special plans and I wasn't planning to wear red or be associated with the razzmatazz of valentine. I woke that morning feeling a little chilly and decided to wear my cardigan as my inner wear. Coincidentally it was red so I wore my red earrings to match. 

When I got out, I saw ladies wearing different shades of red and I said to myself, "valentine people", only for me to realise I was one of them. When I got to the office my colleagues commented that I complied with the valentine colour but I told them it was a coincidence which of course they didn't believe. The day went as normal although a colleague gave me a large bar of dark chocolate with hazel nut in it which was part of her valentine gift. 

After work, I went home. I had my bath, had my dinner and decided to read the newspaper. A story that caught my attention was one about a lady whose boyfriend beat her and threw a hot stove with a pot of boiling stew on it at her, leaving her seriously burnt. An argument about a phone call the lady received led to this. My dad saw me reading it and felt it was the best time to give me advice on relationship and marriage. At first, I was like noooo...not now. I am tired!

However, as he spoke, I began to appreciate his fatherly advice full of wisdom. We had a long talk and he reminded me of little but important things that a woman shouldn't overlook, whether she is married or in a serious relationship. I would have loved to share them with you like he told me, but I am sure you must have heard them before. Instead I will list them out randomly and give you the pleasure of figuring out the details.

Phone ethics-Don't act funny when you want to receive phone calls in the presence of your partner. Delete unimportant messages on your phone that may arouse suspicion. Don't hide to make or receive calls or to send messages. Feel free to let him check your phone if he wants to; you should never have something to hide. Do not be scared to leave your phone around him unlocked. Do not encourage friends to call you at odd hours.

Social ethics-Don't leave him all alone at a function while you hang out with your friends. Do not be the miss or mrs I-know-all-the-guys at an event. Don't keep too many male friends to the detriment of your relationship. Don't disrespect him especially outdoors. Don't use social media as an escape route to do dirty games. (If it ain't right, it ain't right. Once you are committed to a man, stick to him.)

Attitude guide-Never give your partner a reason to be jealous or suspicious. Never try to make him jealous by using your ex. Let him know you are proud of him. Be open and free with your partner. Do not keep secrets. Even if you get home after him, still ask him if he has eaten, what he ate or what he will eat. Always ask him how his day went. Call him, don't always expect him to do the calling. In a case where you earn more, do not show off or rub it in. Never practise tit for tat, it might just get ugly. Accept him for who he is, he can never be perfect. (Reminded me of my true love post) 

Spiritual guide-Always pray for him and commit your relationship to God. It is not easy being a man, he is bound to be tempted. Especially now that temptation wears shorter skirts, tighter pants, is more colourful and in your face.
The one I love the most-Do not let the world influence your love because in the end, it is your happiness that matters.

The above advice is not meant for the female folk only, applies to the men also. So take a cue guys...

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Plan but do not worry-NYSC inspired poem

This poem actually happened. I was strolling in the village one late afternoon when different thoughts about my future rushed into my mind. All of a sudden I became afraid of an uncertain future. I just wrote how I felt because I was the only person I could talk to and it turned out to be beautiful.

Mental Crossroads of a Youth Corps Member

I had roamed the ends of the earth,

I had been to the north, the south, the east and the west,

Yet I found no suitable place to rest my head.

Oh! My poor heart, tired from the rapid blood pumping action, a consequence of adrenaline rush.

My joints, too weak to function;

My throat, parched from asking for directions and numerous questions that yielded further questions.

"How do I get a good job? How would I know my right spouse? Where do I do my Masters? Do I start up my own business?"

Even those that yielded answers contradicted one another;

Making my brain a cave of chaos and disorder;

Just when I was about to give up, wallow in self pity and join the confused crowd, a little voice said to me, “Live wisely and righteously for this moment trusting God for the next.”

Immediately, warmth radiated from my heart and stamped a smile on my face.

I felt strength spread through my body;

I knew I had found it, the answer to all my questions, the answer I was desperately searching for.

I had no cause to worry...

I know many corpers would have at one time felt the same way especially towards the end of the service year. You dread being idle after your service that it sometimes makes you desperate to settle for anything and makes you run to anyone who you feel could be of help. You give yourself migraine by asking yourself numerous questions about your future and thinking out about how good or bad it could be. It is very normal to get a little scared because you do not know what the future holds, but you shouldn't let those mind-boggling thoughts and feelings bother you. 

Worrying will not and will never make things better, even God concurs with that by telling us not to worry about tomorrow. All you need to do is plan. Have your goals to guide you in making the right choices, watch out for opportunities and be prepared to grab them when they come. Some of my friends I served with are now working in great organisations, some are married, some are furthering their education within and outside the country, some are now living abroad, while some are entrepreneurs. Some are doing what they planned to do while some are doing better than they thought would, but they are all doing fine expect those I haven't heard of. The long and short of the above is...worrying is just a pure waste of time. Fear is just false evidence appearing real which we shouldn't allow to rule us. Do your best to get what you want, leave the rest to God, and you will be just fine.

So plan but do not worry.

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My last day in my place of primary assignment with videos-Memoir

Finally, I was leaving my place of primary assignment for good! I was travelling back to Ibadan to prepare for my final parade. Yipeee!!! I was as excited as any corper in Nigeria would be but more excited than those who worked in the cities because I served in a very remote village. (Although I shuttled between the village and the city, some days in the village, others in the city.) You can check out stories about my PPA/NYSC experience by clicking any of these links-
From orientation camp to a strange land 1
From orientation camp to a strange land 2
My first article ever was published #nyscinspired
Story about the city room I detested plus a funny video tour
Found a new room
Tales of my PPA

I wanted to always remember my last day in that village because it was a day I waited anxiously and patiently for and knew I would cherish forever. Living in that village was a terror at first, but I began to endure and appreciate it; although I still couldn't wait for it to be over. On my last day in the village, I woke up late, did the usual 'shower, breakfast, etc' then went to the school to wish my students and colleagues goodbye. As I was about leaving the staff room to go to my room to pack my things, the idea of making a video came to me, and I did just that. I call it my last walk in Bataki-Idiya.  Enjoy...

last walk as a corper in Bataki-Idiya
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IvAmqq7oYuc 

Also I was inspired by my experience as I couldn't believe that a tush girl like me could live well in an uncivilised village like I did. I summarised my experience and emotions in this 3mins video. Check it out!  

my 3mins summary of my NYSC experience
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M1gJx5rf7fU

FYI-I was part of the Batch A 2010/11 set...just sharing my experience


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The NYSC Orientation Camp in a Different Light

As a headnote: I wrote this article when I was in camp during my orientation. It was published in  Oyo state NYSC bulletin called the Periscope. Now that the Batch C corps members are going to their various orientation camps, I want to use the opportunity to share it again.

In the course of preparing to go for the three-week orientation programme, which is the first phase of the National Youth Service Corps, would-be corps members are told all sorts of scary stories and exaggerations that make them dread going to the camp. However, my experience has proven otherwise.

In my opinion, the three-week orientation camp is a place where graduates from various reputable institutions all over Nigeria come together to achieve one goal; service to our motherland and great country, Nigeria. The camp is run by diligent camp officials who ensure that each moment in camp is scheduled for one activity or the other. These activities instill basic skills and values in corps members that make them better when imbibed.

Parade: The parade ground also known as holy ground, “holy” implying that when on it corps members are expected to respect it by behaving appropriately.  When on the parade ground, we learn to be disciplined, by not engaging in unnecessary discussions or causing distractions; to be on the alert and be attentive, by performing the right body movement when the order is called for; to be patriotic, by respecting the recitation of the NYSC anthem, the National anthem and the hoisting of the National flag.

Drills and Man O’ War: They are simply exercise routines that help us to keep fit, not chores, as most corps members see it. As we all know, regular exercise is required for better body metabolism, for proper blood circulation, and to keep the heart in good condition.

Sports and Social activities: Sports are another form of exercise and are pastimes for some individuals. In the camp, we have football and volleyball; social activities such as cultural dance, drama, singing, cooking, pageantries, etc. Corps members are given the opportunities to showcase their talents on stage and are also allowed to anchor shows. These activities are channels of talent discovery and we all have talents which we need to discover and work on.

Lectures: We are all students because we learn every day, either through our personal experience or from the experience of others, from the media, from books or in the classroom. Lectures offered in camp which are free are usually from reputable organisations such as NDLEA, and from respectable individuals. They also offer training in various courses like management, computer training, foreign languages, and many others at subsidised fees. Is it not a golden opportunity one must not miss?

In conclusion, the three-week orientation camp is an opportunity waiting to be harnessed and a platform for self discovery and development. Would-be corps members would also come to us someday to seek advice before travelling to their various camps and we should make it a point of duty to tell them about the orientation camp in a different light.             

  

                                                                                               



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How to prevent teeth sensitivity-my story...

My story
I have soft enamel (sad face). My dad calls my teeth 'milk teeth' (bland face). I found this out some years back when I paid a visit to my dentist to fill a hole in my tooth. He advised me not to brush too hard and to get soft tooth brushes. He also advised me to avoid putting my teeth under pressure like cracking hard substances such as strong bones or opening crown corks of soft drinks with my teeth. I remember the first and only time I tried it, I felt pieces of my tooth on my tongue (my tooth cracked). That happened about 12 years back. 

Also when I was much younger, while taking any sweet drink I would fill my entire mouth with it 'as if I was rinsing my mouth with it' before swallowing it. It just felt better that way (more or less relishing the taste) but I never realised I was damaging my enamel until I went to the dentist and discovered I had soft enamel yikes!!!

Recently, I suffered from teeth sensitivity and it was the least pleasant experience. My incisors and canines were sensitive to everything: my tooth brush, biting any kind of food, even air...it was that bad. I couldn't brush with my toothbrush, I had to use cotton wool. I racked my brain for what would have caused it and found nothing. I was so afraid and confused that I 'googled' it up for information. 

After reading, I realised my dental errors and made corrections; they have been working for me since then. I had to update my sister because she believes that the more you brush your teeth, the cleaner and whiter they will become. I don't want anyone I love to suffer teeth sensitivity because it is so unpleasant. It is the reason I decided to share these few dental tips with you all.

Meaning
I would start by saying teeth sensitivity is a sharp shocking sensation in the teeth which is very uncomfortable. It is mainly caused when the enamel wears out and the dentine becomes exposed. The enamel has no nerves but the dentine does which makes us feel pains when it is exposed. The enamel protects the teeth and it is the hardest part of the body but can wear out if not properly taken care of.

Below are ways to prevent our enamel from wear
*Do not brush too hard or use a hard toothbrush (unless your dentist says otherwise): The friction and pressure they cause wears the enamel overtime.

*Do not brush immediately after taking any acidic food or drink and always rinse your mouth afterwards: This is because acidic substances soften and gradually wear out the enamel and brushing immediately after would only make it worse. It is advisable to rinse your mouth with water which is neutral after taking such foods or drinks containing acid. Such as citrus fruits and drinks, sour foods and drinks, soft drinks.
Also it is best to use a straw when taking the above drinks to minimise contact with the teeth.

*General advice: Drink lots of water and eat right. The inside reflects the outside. No matter how hard you try, if the inside is not healthy, it would ultimately affect the outside one way or the other. 

*Go for regular dental check up: Your dentist is your best teeth doctor so always visit him/her to know your dental status. Prevention is better than cure.

I am not an expert on this, neither am I trying to be one. I am just using my experience and little knowledge to educate you as I don't want any of you to fall victim out of ignorance. There are other factors that can cause teeth sensitivity, you can do your research or ask your dentist for more information.

Finally, I don't want smiling to become a pain for you when you are 50 because that is when life truly starts. Say cheese...

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Ladies, instead of buying another lip colour, make one!

I got this inspiration from my younger sister, so this blog post is dedicated to her. I love you sis! Muah!

One Sunday morning, as we were dressing up for church, I noticed my sister was spending more time than usual in front of the mirror. Out of curiosity, I ask her what she was doing. She replied in her sweet tiny voice, "I am mixing the lip gloss." I just smiled and let her be.
However on another day, the idea of mixing lip colours just popped into my head and I resolved to do it the next time I made up. The next time was last week, a Sunday morning and I mixed my light pink and red lip colours. I put a little pink lip colour on the back of my palm, then the red beside it and took from both and mixed on another part of my palm with my finger. It gave me another colour which I fell in love with. I was pleased with my experiment when a friend said, "your lips are hot!"

See...Isn't it lovely and hot?

the pink colour alone

the red colour alone

So ladies, go lip colour experimenting!!!

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15 unconventional and amazing buildings you must see!

Are you an architect or working towards being one? These 15 unconventional and beautiful buildings should give you ideas and inspiration that could spark off your creativity. If you are not architecture-related (like me) but love amazing things, then feed your eyes. A colleague sent them in a mail to a colleague whom I begged to send it to me. I told her I had to share it because the buildings are too beautiful to just stay in my mail box.

1. The Crooked House (Sopot, Poland)

 

2. Forest Spiral - Hundertwasser Building (Darmstadt , Germany)

 
 

3. The Torre Galatea Figueres (Spain)

4. Ferdinand Cheval Palace a.k.a Ideal Palace (France)

 

5. The Basket Building (Ohio , United States)

6. Kansas City Public Library (Missouri , United States)

7. Wonderworks (Orlando, Florida, United States)

8. Habitat 67 (Montreal, Canada)

9. Cubic Houses (Rotterdam, Netherlands)

10. Hang Nga Guesthouse a.k.a Crazy House (Vietnam)

11. The Ufo House (Sanjhih, Taiwan)

12. Nakagin Capsule Tower (Tokyo, Japan)

13. Erwin Wurm: House Attack (Viena, Austria)

14. Wooden Gagster House (Archangelsk, Russia)

15. Ripley's Building (Ontario, Canada)

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